What the God

Written by AJ Teaters

Ask anyone in the world when they felt the closest to experiencing heaven and I think it’s safe to assume that 98% of them will say, “SEX!” (the other 2% are virgins). Sex is amazing, sex is powerful, sex is milk and cookies; it’s perfection. How perfect is sex? Sex is so perfect that society has centered everything on it. Sex is seen everywhere: music, movies, television, advertisement… the list goes on but why do we focus so much on sex? Why, because it’s SEX!

I’m not going to be the obvious egotistical male and say that sex is on my mind 100% of the time, but I will be the honest male and say that it is on my mind 95% of the time and the other 5% of my time is devoted to figuring out a way to get my wife to agree to have sex with me. My justifications for sex range anywhere from missing her touch to burning calories. What I have learned is that no matter the excuse (which I like to think my wife finds cute and endearing) she wants to be close to me.

Side note: Roses don’t hurt the cause either boys ;-).

Sex is a constant thought in my mind (please don’t overlook the sarcasm) but since I am also a Christian, Jesus is a constant thought in my mind. These two thoughts are not at conflict with each other but they do run into each other from time to time which is where the question “Will there be sex in Heaven?” came from.

I like to picture my Heaven with big fluffy clouds, where we are all flying around in white robes, worshipping God, and having sex.

Is there going to be sex in Heaven? The question begs (no pun intended) to be answered. My answer is probably as short and sweet as your first time (emphasis on the short) - it's yes.

Reasons for Sex in Heaven:

1. The Garden of Eden: Heaven on Earth. You can’t try and argue the fact that Adam and Eve didn’t have sex in the Garden. The Perfect Man and Perfect Woman, molded by God’s hands, equals perfect sex (its simple math). If there was sex in the Garden, which was Heaven on Earth, why not in actual Heaven?

2. Song of Solomon comes to mind. It outlines the relationship of a man and woman from courtship to consummation. Song of Solomon is also looked at as an allegory of God’s love for His children or the souls’ relationship to Christ. A few examples of ''Sexy Scripture'':

• Song 4:5 "Your two breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies."
• Song 7:8-9 I said, "I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit." May your breasts be like the clusters of the vine, the fragrance of your breath like apples, and your mouth like the best wine.
• Song 4:16 [ Beloved ] "Awake, north wind, and come, south wind! Blow on my garden, that its fragrance may spread abroad. Let my lover come into his garden and taste its choice fruits."

I hope that I don't have to go into what these scriptures are alluding to, but if you didn't catch on to that last one "Garden" is not referring to a literal garden. It's referring to her vagina, hopefully that clears it up. So, moving forward, if I have my theology correct God resides in Heaven and God is the inspiration for the Bible, then God is thinking about sex in Heaven. God is using the thought of sex to inspire us through His word and where is God... Heaven. Thus, sex in Heaven. (It's all very complicated...kinda like your sex life.)

3. God commanded us to have sex, “As for you, be fruitful and increase in number; multiply on the earth and increase upon it," (Gen. 9:7). Is this the only reason God created sex… for multiplication? Personally, I don’t like to picture my God that mathematical, I like to think of sex as an act of worship to God. What better way to worship God than recreating the allegory He outlined in His love story to us?

And last time I checked Heaven was 24/7, don’t-stop-til-your-body-drops worship. I’m not saying Heaven is going to be one giant orgy (perverts), but what I am saying is that sex will be an option of worship in heaven.

What’s your take? Why might Heaven not be a place for sex?